Indiana’s first day at school…

Well, it’s happened at last! Young Indiana had his first day at school on Thursday. There was excitement the night before, when we carried out the ritual putting-on-of-the-uniform ceremony to make sure it “still fitted” (because he thinks he has grown excessively in the last few weeks since the Princess purchased it??).
Then we had some general complaining… “Why do I have to go to bed! Bed is so boring!” and “Ohhhh! It will take forever for morning to get here!” and “I’ll never be able to go to sleep!” Once he was settled, sleep took over in about a minute, and we could relax.
Lots of things went through my mind that night. I wondered how he will handle being left at school. He really enjoyed Kindergarten, making friends and enjoying the arty crafty activities, and even sat quietly for the story reading at the end of each class! I worried about how he would be at a different (and MUCH larger school) with a group of strangers (except for one little girl from his kinder) and an unfamiliar teacher. I wondered if he would get into a fight and clobber anyone or get biffed, as he tends to be very stubborn if he thinks he has been hard done by.
I guess it’s a normal parents lot to worry about these things, but as this is my first experience at parenthood, I wanted everything to go smoothly for him, and for him to be happy and enjoy his first few days. I took time off work so that I could take him to school and pick him up, so that at least I would be there for him when it counted, and if (God forbid!) anything went wrong and the school called, I would be close at hand.

We arrived at his school with plenty of time to spare, and waited outside his classroom (he is in yellow group, and he has a very friendly and pleasant teacher named Alex). Looking around, I could pick the parents with older kids. They seemed a bit blasé about the whole experience… been there, done that, another one out of the way! Then there were a few others, just like me, who appeared calm and collected, but kept glancing around at their little protégés, checking for tears and bolstering them up as much as possible with questions like “Are you going to have fun at school today, Rastus?” and “Hey, Tholmadis, this is going to be great, isn’t it?” or "See, Jennyfher Seiouxhe, I told you this would be fun! I was right! ...wasn't I?" (names have been changed or manufactured to protect the innocent). I have a theory (based on my own experience that morning) that these questions were not really attempting to placate the kids, but more to calm the parents nerves and convince themselves that their precious little ones would survive the day emotionally unscathed.

We walked into his new classroom, and Alex instructed us to place nametags on both little Indy and his bag, place the bag in his own little nook, then feel free to wander around and check the place out. The school is an open-plan setup, with classrooms divided by walls, but completely open into the centre of the buildings. It feels nice and accessible, not isolated like the old classroom style. Rooms are just closed in enough to negate noise and distraction. Indiana immediately headed for a large plastic cubby house and disappeared into it whilst keeping a close eye on the Princess and I to make sure we weren’t going to abandon him at the first available opportunity. Small children were everywhere, like some sort of noisy infestation. They climbed over things, through things, around things. They drew on anything that wasn’t mobile (we had to keep walking slowly around to avoid becoming masterpieces). They seemed to need to yell to each other, even when within whispering distance.

After a while, the Princess has to leave, so said her goodbyes and headed off, leaving me with Indiana for the last 5 minutes or so before parents would be asked politely but firmly to bugger off. Indy was a little quiet, buy happily helped cover the paper on his table with pictures of men and helicopters. Then the public address system burst into life with the usual blast that scares the hell out of anyone not accustomed to it (namely me), especially nervous parents waiting to leave their children (yep, me again).
I was twisted. I have to say goodbye to my little man and leave without making a fuss, but I really want to stay, or to grab him and make a dash for the door like some sort of demented child snatcher whilst yelling at the top of my voice “It’s ok, son, I won’t leave you here! I won’t abandon you like all these other bad people!”
I squat down awkwardly (due to my bad back, but more about that in a later post) and tell him I have to go now. His little head drops low and he stares at the table. “Will you be ok?” The little blonde head nods. “Have a great first day! I will be back this afternoon to pick you up, alright?”
“Ok Dad.”
“I love you!”
“I love you too, Dad.” says a soft little voice. It looks like one of us is about to break down in tears. He looks so small, so fragile. His little shoulders slump. I want to scoop him up and hold him tight.
My heart sinks, but I get up and walk towards the door, past the screaming little girl who has suddenly become bonded to her mother’s leg with something stronger than Tarzan’s Grip – FEAR. I turn briefly and give him a quick thumbs-up, which he returns half-heartedly, his face missing the usual grin.
I walk the rest of the way to the door, afraid to turn around and look again in case I don’t like what I see.
As I exit the classroom, I look back at him through the large full length windows, expecting to see tears. What? Where the hell has he gone? He’s not sitting at the table where I left him… A quick scout around and I spot him jumping up and down on a large round polystyrene bean bag the size of a table with his little friend from Kinder, a huge smile on his face, yelling at the top of his voice!
Little bugger!

I think I’ve just been taken for a ride by a 5 year old…..

Introduction to The Olde Guye

Welcome to my blog!
Well, here we go! Hang on for the adventure of a lifetime!
Or not.
No, this blog will be more of a slow, gentle cruise around the local park, with a bit of chat thrown in to stop us both nodding off.
Let us start off the conversation with an introduction from me, the Olde Guye. Perhaps I’m not that terribly old at 43, but at times I feel a bit older than that. I have a wife, the lovely Princess, who is wise, beautiful and caring, and sometimes rather tired (just like yours truly!). I have a son, the little 5 year old Indiana (not his real name, but a big fan of Mr Jones, Lego - especially the Indiana Jones or Star Wars variety, and almost any device with a screen) to whom can be attributed part of said tiredness. Indiana also has a foul temper and can be extremely stubborn, but also has the ability to cancel out threats from myself or the Princess with a cute look or ridiculous comment that causes everyone to break into fits of laughter.  We also share the house part-time with 3 step-children of the Princess’ making. They are as follows:

Miss Crench, 10 years old and developing a healthy attitude sprinkled with tears when things don’t go her way, but usually very helpful and nice to have around.

Master Jockstrap, a 14 year old drawing machine who churns through reams of paper, and also can spend days staring at screens playing games if allowed (and sometimes when not allowed, which leads to hours of frowning once appropriate steps are put in place to short circuit aforementioned screen antics).

Master Nickel Arse, who gained his name via his outstanding abilities to sit on it in front of a screen for hours on end. Also has large amounts of attitude to spare, particularly when things don’t go his way or when asked to do tasks around the house. 16 years old, he has somehow gained the knowledge of a 115 year old man who has travelled the world, read most books published on the planet, and experienced all. Can argue until he runs out of oxygen, despite being proven totally incorrect. Can also be quite pleasant to be around when more co-operative. Has been known to sleep in till midday but then complain that he has run out of time to do stuff when asked to go to bed at night. Hmmm.

We also have a small white Poppy the Wonderdog. She is a Fox Terrier cross, but looks a bit like a Chihuahua. She tends to follow either the Princess or myself everywhere whilst trying to dodge the playful advances of young Indiana. Quite clever, she sits up and begs in the hope of gleaning a treat from whomever is ignoring her at the time.
The crew camps in an older house in the Northern Suburbs of Melbourne, Australia. We know the place is old due to the a number of parts falling off the house regularly. This can be fixed with time and money, neither of which tends to be available on a regular basis. One day we would like to fix the old place up a bit, and eventually sell and move to a better abode. We would also like to buy a yacht and live the life of vagabond millionaires. I can’t see either happening in the near future…
I work as a Disability Support worker. I work with a fantastic bunch of guys and girls at a Supported Employment service in the Northern Suburbs. We carry out commercial grounds maintenance (gardening) at almost 40 sites, and also do car cleaning for emergency services. I love my work, and together we make an awesome team.
Well, that’s a short introduction. I hope you feel more acquainted with myself and with the crew. No doubt they will get a few mentions in future posts, so at least you will have some idea of to whom I am referring when I mention them.
Stay tuned for more rants, waffle and general observations from the Olde Guye. Feel free to comment, discuss, correct and advise if you like, but please try to be constructive. I will listen to any comments, as long as they are helpful and/or polite, but I’m not much into letting people hurl rudeness and foul language around, so if you do, don’t be offended if I remove your comments. This is meant to be a light hearted look at life through my eyes, for your entertainment. If it doesn’t appeal to you, that’s ok too.
Tune in and enjoy, and once again, welcome.

The Olde Guye